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Helpless Automaton

A friend of mine believes that homes have feelings and personalities. That her particular 12 X 12 feels abandoned when said friend leaves for work in the morning and that she's thinking about finding a roommate just to assuage the lathe and plaster's feelings. Quite.

Though I dismissed the idea at the time, rather scornfully I might add, I'm starting to reconsider. Now, I know what you're thinking. The whole work-from-home scenario is getting to this guy already and he's hitting the holy herb rather hard. Neither is true. I'm the consumate professional regardless of geography and live a clean and healthy life. Also, there isn't any herb around and the virus will probably affect the supply chain, so that's a bummer.

Yesterday, the kitchen sink started acting up. I've lived in this house for 8 years and it has always behaved beautifully. Until now. The water simply refused to drain. Even after enthusiastic use of the plunger, it just gurgled resentfully and settled down for the long haul. To quote my favourite Discworld character - I can't be having with that kind of thing. I dialled the plumber, social distancing be damned. The man shows up, runs a cold cod eye over the contraption, pulls the connecting pipe out from under the sink with a single twist and shows me the bottom of the pipe which is choked with a week's worth of coffee grounds some mysterious, dark sediment. That was cleaned up in less than a literal minute, for which I was charged Rs. 100. I confess, dear reader, that my stolid, thrify, middle-class upbringing pinched my heart for a beat but I shushed it and quietly paid up. I don't know much about plumbing and I'd rather have a working contraption than a clogged drain to tackle along with my regular job.

No sooner had Mario exited stage left than the electrical socket in the bedroom quietly gave up the ghost. Yep, you guessed it. It too had lived a blameless life so far. Just watt (pun intended) was going on? Did the house sense that I wasn't going anywhere (not figuratively speaking) and decide to air out its problems? Had these issues always existed, only to be ... er... flushed down the proverbial drain by a usually harried me? Was it all a giant conspiracy coincidence? I leave you to decide.

In the case of the socket, I do have some basic handyman skills, thanks to assisting the fatherland decades ago and generally observing what the electricians did whenever repairs around the house were called for. So, I opened up the board and was rewarded with a shower of assorted bits, pieces, springs and whathaveyou. Was I shocked? No, because I was using a tester, like a normal person. Anyway, it looked like something beyond my capabilities so I traipsed along to the electrician's shop, again, social distancing be damned. The bloke shows up with a new socket, connects all the wires in about 5 minutes and charges me Rs. 200. I paid up with nary a whimper.

What I did come to appreciate yesterday is the sore need for a bit of 'do it yourself' knowledge. Basic electrical, plumbing, cooking, wood-working and even auto maintenance (if my car ever stalls, heaven knows what I'd do). I can certainly afford the service of experts for all of these and it's really not about saving a shekel here and there. There's an weird satisfaction to doing something yourself. I've certainly experienced this spark of happiness when fixing stuff before but I've never got around to developing my knowledge further. Now, it looks like this house will nudge me along. Que sera sera.

Song for the moment: Keep an eye - Diana Ross

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