Charles Bukowski said numerous things, most of which can safely be bundled into the misanthropy box. One of his less acerbic observations was on the passage of time; as we grow older, things or patterns start to repeat themselves. It made sense to me this September, both from a professional and a personal viewpoint.
After 2.5 years, I have changed agencies again. The now previous workplace had a soothing everyday cadence that's hard to come by in this day and age of cutthroat competition and digital marketing mass hypnosis. I came to know a lot of people there and was friendly with quite a few of them. Be it the admin staff, canteen chaps, colleagues or general hangers-on, I could and did walk in every day meeting, greeting and occasionally smiling. It is a rather addictive, pleasant pattern of life.
Yet, the work I did was more than boring, frustrated at every stage by the convoluted thoughts, selfish agendas and downright egotistical pigheadedness of clients. My colleagues and I became caught up in a disheartening and sometimes downright cynical confirmation bias loop. We tried immensely to buoy each other's spirits but often got swept up in a dark pessimistic tide, not helped by a frustrating lack of support from our seniors. "We'll fight the next battle" they'd say and we'd sigh and nod, both parties complicit in the knowledge that we would not. I once read that if two parties in a business relationship agree on every single point, one of them soon becomes redundant. Unfortunately, money talks rather loudly and boorishly nowadays and most agency folk are reduced to the status of nodding dolls in the face of some pretty ridiculous horseshit from clients. I never believed my ex-agency would capitulate to this disease but it has.
The agency also moved offices from a shabby yet charming office in Nariman Point to a soulless (albeit cockroach-free, it has to be said) space in BKC. Say what you will but Bandra East is a filthy hell at the best of times. And, the monsoons are certainly far away from those. The commute became infinitely more challenging and stressful for almost every employee. The downright idiotic 'agile' seating concept meant that comforting team relationships broke down completely, replaced by the sudden prospect of wandering around every morning like a depressed Bedouin tribe looking for a quiet oasis to sit together and work. I winced at the desperate, jargon-filled emails from HR extolling the virtues of this dynamic way of seating, mentally slapping my forehead about how clueless or ruthless they'd become. Probably the latter, since humans have a wonderfully adaptive nature. Besides, everyone needs the money.
Speaking of which, I needed money! With no increments in sight for the second year running, my bank account was faced with the thought of being on a diet of peanuts for 3 years and rebelled.
So, I found myself at a new agency this week. A completely different, frantic energy and dynamic, more strangers than friends and an advanced role. My heart ached for the familiar on the first day but even I'm not sentimental enough to become so stupid about it. Truth is, I needed to move because my career prospects were stagnating faster than the last mildewed cauliflower at the greengrocers. I'm also at the kind of age where I need some big wins and accolades, without which I'll be drummed out of this industry in about 6 years. With no other noticeable talents to monetise, jumping into this barracuda-infested sea/agency was my only option. We'll see whether I stay afloat.
In matters of the heart, I sailed my ship into the sea of romance, only to have it sink without a trace. No more will be said on the situation though I did come out of it better than the last time around. We live and learn... at least to take rejection with a modicum of maturity. Although it (rejection) is becoming a worrisome pattern too.
Song for the moment: Ease Back - Grant Green
After 2.5 years, I have changed agencies again. The now previous workplace had a soothing everyday cadence that's hard to come by in this day and age of cutthroat competition and digital marketing mass hypnosis. I came to know a lot of people there and was friendly with quite a few of them. Be it the admin staff, canteen chaps, colleagues or general hangers-on, I could and did walk in every day meeting, greeting and occasionally smiling. It is a rather addictive, pleasant pattern of life.
Yet, the work I did was more than boring, frustrated at every stage by the convoluted thoughts, selfish agendas and downright egotistical pigheadedness of clients. My colleagues and I became caught up in a disheartening and sometimes downright cynical confirmation bias loop. We tried immensely to buoy each other's spirits but often got swept up in a dark pessimistic tide, not helped by a frustrating lack of support from our seniors. "We'll fight the next battle" they'd say and we'd sigh and nod, both parties complicit in the knowledge that we would not. I once read that if two parties in a business relationship agree on every single point, one of them soon becomes redundant. Unfortunately, money talks rather loudly and boorishly nowadays and most agency folk are reduced to the status of nodding dolls in the face of some pretty ridiculous horseshit from clients. I never believed my ex-agency would capitulate to this disease but it has.
The agency also moved offices from a shabby yet charming office in Nariman Point to a soulless (albeit cockroach-free, it has to be said) space in BKC. Say what you will but Bandra East is a filthy hell at the best of times. And, the monsoons are certainly far away from those. The commute became infinitely more challenging and stressful for almost every employee. The downright idiotic 'agile' seating concept meant that comforting team relationships broke down completely, replaced by the sudden prospect of wandering around every morning like a depressed Bedouin tribe looking for a quiet oasis to sit together and work. I winced at the desperate, jargon-filled emails from HR extolling the virtues of this dynamic way of seating, mentally slapping my forehead about how clueless or ruthless they'd become. Probably the latter, since humans have a wonderfully adaptive nature. Besides, everyone needs the money.
Speaking of which, I needed money! With no increments in sight for the second year running, my bank account was faced with the thought of being on a diet of peanuts for 3 years and rebelled.
So, I found myself at a new agency this week. A completely different, frantic energy and dynamic, more strangers than friends and an advanced role. My heart ached for the familiar on the first day but even I'm not sentimental enough to become so stupid about it. Truth is, I needed to move because my career prospects were stagnating faster than the last mildewed cauliflower at the greengrocers. I'm also at the kind of age where I need some big wins and accolades, without which I'll be drummed out of this industry in about 6 years. With no other noticeable talents to monetise, jumping into this barracuda-infested sea/agency was my only option. We'll see whether I stay afloat.
In matters of the heart, I sailed my ship into the sea of romance, only to have it sink without a trace. No more will be said on the situation though I did come out of it better than the last time around. We live and learn... at least to take rejection with a modicum of maturity. Although it (rejection) is becoming a worrisome pattern too.
Song for the moment: Ease Back - Grant Green
Comments