Have you ever read through the various mythological tales, religious texts, films etc. and thought "Oh! puhlease.... there is no way that happened "? If so, well take a gander at the twists in the scenarios mentioned below.
No offence... and if you do take offence, please stop reading this blog, because there's a part - 2 coming up sometime.
1. The Ramayan:
Kaikeyi: Ram, you must leave Ayodhya for 14 years
Ram (cool as a cucumber): Fine. No problem. There's a nice camp-ground just past the city gates. I can always have provisions delivered to my tent.
Kaikeyi: Ehh... no. That's not what I meant.... you're to go into the forests for 14 years.
Ram: Weeeeell..... all right. But if I go, Lakshman goes with me.
Lakshman does a double-take: Dude, what the hell !!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ram is in the forest with Sita and Lakshman. Bharat approaches.
Bharat: Bhaiyya! You are the rightful king. You have to come back with me.
Ram (with a supercilious look): No, no Bharat. I have to obey my parents. It is only right that...
Bharat: Okay, bye.
Ram: What the...
Bharat: O yea... (clears throat) well, in that case I'll only rule on your behalf. Give me something of yours so that we may remember you by.
Ram (muttering under his breath): Oh god! what more does he want ? He's got all my clothes, chariots and whatnot and left me in these rags.
Bharat: Yes... a token. How about them slippers?
Ram thinks to himself - Damn!! and I'd just broken these in too....
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
2. The Prince of Egypt:
A crowd of rather tired and raggedy-looking people led by a bearded man with a staff in his hand, is marching wearily thru the desert. A few remarks are heard...
X: "Let my people go" he said... and it never occurred to us to ask him where we were going !!
Y: Round and round in bloody circles... there's that cactus we passed an hour ago. Why in blazes won't he ask for directions ?
Z: "Oooo... I can bring in locusts... I can part the sea..." Ask him to get us across a patch of sand and look what happens !
A donkey telling another: God! that tablet weighed a ton... thank the heavens it fell off and no one noticed. You doing all right then ?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
3. In the garden of Eden:
Eve is sitting alone under a tree...
Eve: My, am I starving.... and isn't that typical ? The only fruit tree for miles and its off-limits.
Satan, in the guise of the snake slithers down, with an apple: Here you go then... something to munch on.
Eve: Yuck... not bloody likely! You've already bitten into that... (wanders away)
Satan: Would you look at that !! And she doesn't even appreciate that I got it for her, considering I got no hands. Bah! Phooey.... (tosses apple on the grass and slithers away)
Adam comes by: My, am I starving. Hey, here's an apple....
No offence... and if you do take offence, please stop reading this blog, because there's a part - 2 coming up sometime.
1. The Ramayan:
Kaikeyi: Ram, you must leave Ayodhya for 14 years
Ram (cool as a cucumber): Fine. No problem. There's a nice camp-ground just past the city gates. I can always have provisions delivered to my tent.
Kaikeyi: Ehh... no. That's not what I meant.... you're to go into the forests for 14 years.
Ram: Weeeeell..... all right. But if I go, Lakshman goes with me.
Lakshman does a double-take: Dude, what the hell !!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ram is in the forest with Sita and Lakshman. Bharat approaches.
Bharat: Bhaiyya! You are the rightful king. You have to come back with me.
Ram (with a supercilious look): No, no Bharat. I have to obey my parents. It is only right that...
Bharat: Okay, bye.
Ram: What the...
Bharat: O yea... (clears throat) well, in that case I'll only rule on your behalf. Give me something of yours so that we may remember you by.
Ram (muttering under his breath): Oh god! what more does he want ? He's got all my clothes, chariots and whatnot and left me in these rags.
Bharat: Yes... a token. How about them slippers?
Ram thinks to himself - Damn!! and I'd just broken these in too....
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
2. The Prince of Egypt:
A crowd of rather tired and raggedy-looking people led by a bearded man with a staff in his hand, is marching wearily thru the desert. A few remarks are heard...
X: "Let my people go" he said... and it never occurred to us to ask him where we were going !!
Y: Round and round in bloody circles... there's that cactus we passed an hour ago. Why in blazes won't he ask for directions ?
Z: "Oooo... I can bring in locusts... I can part the sea..." Ask him to get us across a patch of sand and look what happens !
A donkey telling another: God! that tablet weighed a ton... thank the heavens it fell off and no one noticed. You doing all right then ?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
3. In the garden of Eden:
Eve is sitting alone under a tree...
Eve: My, am I starving.... and isn't that typical ? The only fruit tree for miles and its off-limits.
Satan, in the guise of the snake slithers down, with an apple: Here you go then... something to munch on.
Eve: Yuck... not bloody likely! You've already bitten into that... (wanders away)
Satan: Would you look at that !! And she doesn't even appreciate that I got it for her, considering I got no hands. Bah! Phooey.... (tosses apple on the grass and slithers away)
Adam comes by: My, am I starving. Hey, here's an apple....
Comments